Day One Thousand and Thirty Eight - A Blackthorn-Badger Special Report

Colonel Blackthorn-Badger here.

Miss Pancake has asked me to take the notes at Master Emmet’s wedding.

Unfortunately some deranged bureaucrat had decreed that dogs were persona non grata at the location.

So I have been honoured to be her scribe for the auspice event.

Considering that the event took place at the summer retreat of the rather deranged Mackenzie King we went to the location the evening before to sanitize everything.

Festis, Furrgus’s and I circumscribed the location by pouring third rate Bulgarian whiskey in the pattern of the Blackthorn-Badger tartan.

Then as the clock struck twelve Festis on his pibroch and Furrgus on his accordion, did a stirring rendering of the Highland Cathedral, driving any mischievous sìth from the environs.

So yesterday as we boarded Mister Clifford, we were confident the site was well protected from gouls, kelpies, wulvers or stray bean-nigh.

Through the kind efforts and arm twisting of Richard we were able to disembark close to the site.

The off-road wheel was attached to the chair and we were off.

Mister Tyler provided the muscle.

The ceremony went off without a hitch.

The efforts of Niamh and Tarryn flowered everywhere.

And not one was liberated from a stranger’s garden, which unfortunately broke millennia of Blackthorn-Badger tradition.

Miss Alice was spectacular as she made her appearance.

We only saw it from the periphery, as we three were the self appointed mystical security.

Well, where Mackenzie King is concerned one does not take the normal for granted.

Now considering the weather the decision to have water coolers available was well done.

The same nameless bureaucrats who prevented Miss P’s attendance also mandated against mint juleps and iced Champers.

But we struggled on and managed to look composed for the obligatory documentation of the event.

And eventually all the regular suspects were rounded up, including Mister Charlie.

Fortunately Emmet and Alice chose the perfect venue for the reception.

There was enough champagne to even impress Furrgus’s jaded opinion.

And the scones, the scones, my goodness the scones, well we filled our sporrans to the brim.

Since we were no longer on security we were able to mingle.

Everyone was there, Judge Louise, Professor Jill, all of Emmet’s Dungeon and Dragons friends, Alice’s aunts and uncles even some who braved the American border.

And of course everyone of the Mahoneys.

And there was a reunion as Festis and Furrgus’s old landlords, Aunt and Jane and Uncle George were naturally there too. My lord.

Then we all bundled ourselves and Mrs. Eileen into Mister Clifford and arrived at the reception.

Unfortunately they decided to forgo the customary speeches, so I could not apologize for the absence of the Imperious Pigs marching pipes and oboes. They were in Ukrain. ‘Nought said.

And in spite of the crush, there was so much extra and extraordinarily delicious food, that it was all bundled over to Miss Bruna’s refrigerator.

And as could we be expected, as soon as the “auld ones” departed a follow-on party erupted back at our home.

Festis, Furrgus and I went to the pub to relax.